i. I fight necessity with silence, trudge through my day like the house is a jungle, not soft carpet. we suffer together, but I hold myself to sharper knives than you.
scrubbing walls & floors, we expect pristine but are presented with looked-down-on. given shame for these four walls. home smells like life, like children & adults with too many problems. but the windows stay open.
ii. new choices, daring yourself, asking for what you hope will satisfy. playing roulette with your tongue. sticking to known & ashamed.
we laugh because we love each other, because no one wants to point fingers, no one wants the debt of disappointment. we take chances with our taste buds, not our hearts.
iii. fulfill expectations. be what they whisper you are, proving their assumptions right. hide your face, but open your arms.
your hugs are not bitter.
iv. for heaven’s sake, I’m still a child, still growing. discovering pieces I didn’t see in the instructions. I’m missing my guardian angel & I’d tell you if I could. but you didn’t teach me about my mouth.
v. pillow, be kind. nightlight, give me back my memories, those hushed conversations I never bothered to record. take away today so I can dream my way to tomorrow.
inhale exhale. repeat.